Tuesday, August 25, 2009
Lies, Damn Lies, and Statistics
The above phrase, originally attributed to Benjamin Disraeli and later recycled by Mark Twain came to my attention this evening. While scouring the press for something to catch my eye, my eyes rested over and over again on the future of Plaxico Burress. Articles in many papers and electronic outlets are already speculating about his return.
The gifted athlete was on ESPN telling his side of the story. He says he almost died. Of stupidity. He's about to surrender to authorities having plead guilty of illegal gun possession. This is a settlement, a reduction of charges. Originally included, among other things, was unlawful discharge of a weapon. In his own leg. A crack shot, that Mr. Burress.
I am reminded of the writings of one of my influences in this project that I have thrust upon myself. I read Mike Royko daily, first in the Chicago Daily News, then the Sun-Times when the Daily News went the way of the rest of the afternoon papers in the land of the brave and the home of the free. I even read him in the Chicago Tribune when Royko left in a huff when the Sun-Times was bought by Rupert Murdoch. Mike Royko had an annual "Gun Owner of the Year" award column, where he had his own sort of 'top ten list' long before David Letterman was on the air. One of these gun owners was the sort who was never going to let the criminal element get HIM! He kept his gun under his pillow. One night, tired and half asleep, he saw something moving at the foot of his bed. He grabbed his gun and blasted at the suspected sneak thief, shooting off his big toe. Yup, he bagged the interloper all right. That toe would never sneak up on HIM! But I digress...
Plaxico Burress has joined the parade of convicted NFL stars. About ten years ago a book named "Pros and Cons" was released, documenting the huge number of NFL players with criminal records. While on a film set in Los Angeles I looked at this book, borrowing it briefly from a fellow film worker during a lunch break. There was an appendix that had the names of current (as I say, this was ten years ago) players with rap sheets, and their crimes. Twenty-five percent had arrest records. Twenty-one percent for felonies. Some of the players listed had one DUI, but many had a large number of offenses far more serious. Lots of spousal abuse, assault and battery, and minor drug charges. Some players had arrests for auto theft, armed robbery, bank robbery, sexual assault, rape and even manslaughter.
I just did a little bit of research on this subject and was highly amused to find a 2007 article in the San Diego Union-Tribune where the NFL defends itself on its record of rewarding criminals who can play the game. Here is a quote from the article:
The NFL said the study unfairly included criminal incidents in college and that their rate of arrests is no different than, say, a group of plumbers.
Ok, so the armed assaults, auto thefts, bank robberies, and sexual assaults, were merely youthful indiscretions.
I'm under the impression that lots of plumbers are NFL fans, and would probably object to being compared to PacMan Jones' rap sheet and Reggie Lewis' being suspected as being involved in a double murder, case dropped for insufficient evidence. Being a dog owner myself, I don't even want to get into the subject of Michael Vick. I can't speak rationally on the subject. I don't know any plumbers who could be compared to these three. The plumbers I know are hard working people. They don't nearly make the money of even a first year fifth round draft pick who barely made the team.
The article went on to say that the twenty-one percent statistic of NFL felons did not take into consideration that really only a small percentage of active players committed crimes while signed to an NFL contract, and that a more accurate statistic would be more like one in forty-five players, about one per team, and the rate of DUI busts was more like one out of 144 players. The NFL players are just like everybody else. Like you, like your plumber, your mechanic, maybe even your kid's school teacher.
Still, this statistic is twice the national average. So, according to NFL statistics, the rate of criminality among active players while under contract is not so bad, only double that of the rest of the country.
Yes indeed. They're just like everybody else. According to them. Americans everywhere make an average salary of a million bucks and beat their wives. I know this is true because someone from the commissioner's office told me so.
The gifted athlete was on ESPN telling his side of the story. He says he almost died. Of stupidity. He's about to surrender to authorities having plead guilty of illegal gun possession. This is a settlement, a reduction of charges. Originally included, among other things, was unlawful discharge of a weapon. In his own leg. A crack shot, that Mr. Burress.
I am reminded of the writings of one of my influences in this project that I have thrust upon myself. I read Mike Royko daily, first in the Chicago Daily News, then the Sun-Times when the Daily News went the way of the rest of the afternoon papers in the land of the brave and the home of the free. I even read him in the Chicago Tribune when Royko left in a huff when the Sun-Times was bought by Rupert Murdoch. Mike Royko had an annual "Gun Owner of the Year" award column, where he had his own sort of 'top ten list' long before David Letterman was on the air. One of these gun owners was the sort who was never going to let the criminal element get HIM! He kept his gun under his pillow. One night, tired and half asleep, he saw something moving at the foot of his bed. He grabbed his gun and blasted at the suspected sneak thief, shooting off his big toe. Yup, he bagged the interloper all right. That toe would never sneak up on HIM! But I digress...
Plaxico Burress has joined the parade of convicted NFL stars. About ten years ago a book named "Pros and Cons" was released, documenting the huge number of NFL players with criminal records. While on a film set in Los Angeles I looked at this book, borrowing it briefly from a fellow film worker during a lunch break. There was an appendix that had the names of current (as I say, this was ten years ago) players with rap sheets, and their crimes. Twenty-five percent had arrest records. Twenty-one percent for felonies. Some of the players listed had one DUI, but many had a large number of offenses far more serious. Lots of spousal abuse, assault and battery, and minor drug charges. Some players had arrests for auto theft, armed robbery, bank robbery, sexual assault, rape and even manslaughter.
I just did a little bit of research on this subject and was highly amused to find a 2007 article in the San Diego Union-Tribune where the NFL defends itself on its record of rewarding criminals who can play the game. Here is a quote from the article:
The NFL said the study unfairly included criminal incidents in college and that their rate of arrests is no different than, say, a group of plumbers.
Ok, so the armed assaults, auto thefts, bank robberies, and sexual assaults, were merely youthful indiscretions.
I'm under the impression that lots of plumbers are NFL fans, and would probably object to being compared to PacMan Jones' rap sheet and Reggie Lewis' being suspected as being involved in a double murder, case dropped for insufficient evidence. Being a dog owner myself, I don't even want to get into the subject of Michael Vick. I can't speak rationally on the subject. I don't know any plumbers who could be compared to these three. The plumbers I know are hard working people. They don't nearly make the money of even a first year fifth round draft pick who barely made the team.
The article went on to say that the twenty-one percent statistic of NFL felons did not take into consideration that really only a small percentage of active players committed crimes while signed to an NFL contract, and that a more accurate statistic would be more like one in forty-five players, about one per team, and the rate of DUI busts was more like one out of 144 players. The NFL players are just like everybody else. Like you, like your plumber, your mechanic, maybe even your kid's school teacher.
Still, this statistic is twice the national average. So, according to NFL statistics, the rate of criminality among active players while under contract is not so bad, only double that of the rest of the country.
Yes indeed. They're just like everybody else. According to them. Americans everywhere make an average salary of a million bucks and beat their wives. I know this is true because someone from the commissioner's office told me so.
