Wednesday, December 30, 2009
The Suffering of Anastasia
"Stop the presses!" Newspapermen would say in my father's day when they had a new story that had to get out in the next edition. I'm not sure what they say now, but it could be something like "Cancel the print command!"
Anastasia is being horribly oppressed. Not the missing heir to the Czar's St. Petersburgh throne. A different, though equally privileged Anastasia. Anastasia Kelly, A.I.G.’s vice chairwoman for legal, human resources, corporate affairs and corporate communications. She's quitting. It seems that after she participated in the crash of the insurance giant and was part of a team of uber-executives that begged, hats in hand, for a government bailout the size of Mt. Everest, she is now angry at the indignity of that same government for enforcing a pay ceiling of a half-million dollars per year. Gee. A half-million dollars per year. She'll have to go on food stamps. She won't be able to afford to put her ass on a gold-plated toilet seat. She may have to walk her own dog and (HORRORS!) retrieve its fecal droppings. I have to say retrieve fecal droppings in the case of such a high level corporate powerhouse. It is we lowly average citizens who, when we exercise our hounds, pick up shit. At least the civic-minded and responsible of us pick up. Maybe if we worked for A.I.G. we would have a legal team who could find an angle to make the government financially compensate us for "waste removal."
Anastasia won't be alone, munching crackers in the dark of her apartment, now that she can't afford to pay her electric bill since she's only making a half-million dollars per year. It seems that Suzanne Folsom, chief compliance and regulatory officer, has departed A.I.G. as well, "to pursue other opportunities." Possibly to assist in the wreckage of another company in exchange for a golden parachute.
Anastasia's severance package has been reported to be $3,800,000. Hell, if someone offered me $3.8 million to go away, my bags would be packed, and packed in a hurry.
The best and the brightest of the corporate giants, who have awarded themselves huge financial compensation packages, have shown their worth by running the world economy into a spiraling chaos at the expense of the rest of us.
I'm honestly surprised that Jacobean mobs have not arisen to drag the cake eaters to the tumbrel, paraded the culprits to a public square, and dusted off the guillotine.
The reason this has not happened, I believe, is at the root of the American Dream. Secretly the angry underclass believe that one day, they too can be awarded a huge payday for ruining a company and putting thousands of people out of work. I believe that there's a course in it at business college, and that the waiting list to take this course is growing.
Anastasia is being horribly oppressed. Not the missing heir to the Czar's St. Petersburgh throne. A different, though equally privileged Anastasia. Anastasia Kelly, A.I.G.’s vice chairwoman for legal, human resources, corporate affairs and corporate communications. She's quitting. It seems that after she participated in the crash of the insurance giant and was part of a team of uber-executives that begged, hats in hand, for a government bailout the size of Mt. Everest, she is now angry at the indignity of that same government for enforcing a pay ceiling of a half-million dollars per year. Gee. A half-million dollars per year. She'll have to go on food stamps. She won't be able to afford to put her ass on a gold-plated toilet seat. She may have to walk her own dog and (HORRORS!) retrieve its fecal droppings. I have to say retrieve fecal droppings in the case of such a high level corporate powerhouse. It is we lowly average citizens who, when we exercise our hounds, pick up shit. At least the civic-minded and responsible of us pick up. Maybe if we worked for A.I.G. we would have a legal team who could find an angle to make the government financially compensate us for "waste removal."
Anastasia won't be alone, munching crackers in the dark of her apartment, now that she can't afford to pay her electric bill since she's only making a half-million dollars per year. It seems that Suzanne Folsom, chief compliance and regulatory officer, has departed A.I.G. as well, "to pursue other opportunities." Possibly to assist in the wreckage of another company in exchange for a golden parachute.
Anastasia's severance package has been reported to be $3,800,000. Hell, if someone offered me $3.8 million to go away, my bags would be packed, and packed in a hurry.
The best and the brightest of the corporate giants, who have awarded themselves huge financial compensation packages, have shown their worth by running the world economy into a spiraling chaos at the expense of the rest of us.
I'm honestly surprised that Jacobean mobs have not arisen to drag the cake eaters to the tumbrel, paraded the culprits to a public square, and dusted off the guillotine.
The reason this has not happened, I believe, is at the root of the American Dream. Secretly the angry underclass believe that one day, they too can be awarded a huge payday for ruining a company and putting thousands of people out of work. I believe that there's a course in it at business college, and that the waiting list to take this course is growing.
